So I opened a delicious granola bar this morning, took a bite and set it on the counter in the wrapper. Then proceeded to start cleaning off the counter. I think to myself: “Why is there a granola bar wrapper here? I’m a fucking idiot. I better throw that shit away with this other shit on the counter.” Then proceeded to throw away 9/10 of a granola bar I had just opened seconds before.

This is my day now.